For us a healthy relationship means comfort, happiness, love and respect. When these elements flow naturally we feel good. A slight deviation among them lands us in trouble. Our relationship is mostly conditional today. Faith, belief and trust are no longer the binding factors for the relationships. We loss of power and purity. We never understand each other. We lost perseverance and we start blame game immediately, started exchanging harsh words and then many things.
A healthy relationship is nothing but exchange of energy. The thought, action and work should work in close coordination for a healthy relationship. If our words are of love, but our thoughts are of hurt then the relationship won’t be healthy. In most cases we blame the person in other side and be in a safe sit. Regardless of the nature of the event or nature of the insult, reaction is the choice of ours. We can prove it through an example. To a particular situation we can see how different people react in different ways. This means we have choices. We can react very strongly, strongly, normally or not at all. But we should never blame the other for our reaction. If we change our focus in this direction the relationship would hardly go bitter.
Expectation is another factor for disturbed relationships. Parents educate their children, love their children, put them in high-profile institutions and always wish the best for them. In case the child does not find a good job after the education the bitterness in relationship starts. Even if S/he gets a job and could not give attention to his/her parents for some reason, the bitterness starts. This means we love our children and put some conditions somehow. This is not love. This is business. For husband wife, if everything goes on well then the relationship is better. If something goes wrong, the bitterness starts. This is not really love. This is not expected in good relationship. If something goes wrong, as parents we must understand this. In husband wife case, if there is some level of misunderstanding, someone must accept it. So for a better relationship we must move from expectation to acceptance.
Finally let’s understand the concept of giving in relationship. If we expect love and happiness we must give love and happiness. So we must change our focus from “give me respect” to “I respect you”. Healthy relationship is a source of energy just like the sun brightens every corner of the earth. So think now where the relationship goes wrong and act accordingly.